Actually, I suppose it's not a game really, it's more of an attempt to let idiots know they're idiots, which in its own right can be somewhat of a game. Kind of like, you do realize you're an idiot, right? No? Well, perhaps I can trick you somehow into agreeing with me. After all, you're wearing a wife beater in the middle of winter and drinking a PBR at 8:00am, it shouldn't be too hard. But that's just a hypothetical situation, friends.
Anyway, this new pastime I'm creating here is going to be called Slurpeeing, or Iceeing, or Jamba Juicing. It's pretty self-explanatory, and a good pastime for those of us who are fed up with morons but lack the testicles to do anything about it in person. The way this works is you drive around fully stocked with juicy, smoothie-type beverages and throw them at people who piss you off. The bicyclist who rides in the middle of the car lane instead of the bike lane, then crosses three lanes of traffic to make a left turn while everyone else comes to a complete stop. Or the idiot making a right turn who looks at you coming, pulls out anyway, then goes about ten MPH slower than the posted speed limit. Or the person with the Yes on 8 stickers on their car--they are a definite target. I suppose the scope of this game is pretty limited, unless you find the stones to take it out into more public place. Like, wouldn't it be awesome if everywhere you went you had a smoothie to throw at someone stupid? Like the person who gets all the way through the checkout and then realizes they forgot their wallet in the car? I'm always the guy behind them trying to buy one thing--it never fails. A nice smoothie to throw in their stupid face would seem like a nice reward for their idiocy.
I guess it all boils down to the old bumper-sticker adage, "I'd be nicer if you were smarter." Stupid people should get slurpee'd. Maybe then they'd stop being so stupid. I'm not the smartest person in the world, but I like to think I'm aware enough of my surroundings to not inconvenience others when I don't know what's going on. If I don't know something, I ask. I don't assume that my needs will be attended to when I'm the one in the wrong. Like if you're the person who makes the entire lane of traffic stop because you decided you wanted to turn left at the last minute, why should everyone be nice and let you over? I've made that mistake plenty of times, but I don't slam on my brakes, flip on the turn signal and make everyone else wait while I inch across to the next lane. No, I drive my happy little ass to the next street, make a right, make another right, and make a left turn from that intersection. It's not a difficult procedure really. Ater all, you're the one who screwed up, you should be the one who makes the extra effort. Otherwise, some smart person driving by should throw a slurpee at you. Or a jamba juice--it's really up to them.
It's not like eggs that corrode your paint, or paint that paints over your paint, it's just a little ice, juice, sorbet, and fruit. It washes right off, but it will certainly make you think twice about being an idiot. Or at least you would hope so. But probably the idiot in the wifebeater with the PBR at 8:00am will never learn, no matter how many slurpees to the face he gets. It's unfortunate, really.
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